PCs with Caiman

[silentscout]

OI!!!!

Comments

[headsplitter]

[ He stirs... just a tiny bit. His head turning but only miniscule, like there's barely enough energy to even do that. ]

...L... [ Lalli. ]

[silentscout]

[I fukken forgot Caiman is a lizard and probably sleeps with his eyes open.]

Mmm, I'm here. I didn't want you to be alone.

[headsplitter]

[ STOP HE SLEEPS WITH HIS EYES CLOSED LIKE A HUMAN. ]

...Lalli, I...

[ He raises his hands... slowly, almost timidly. They're both trembling, and he just drops them. ]

Why?

[silentscout]

Because friends don't let friends be alone, especially during something like this.

[headsplitter]

Lalli...

[ The slightest slump of his shoulders, a release of tension but only due to resignation. ]

You're still going to call me that? After today?

[silentscout]

Yes.

...I didn't vote for you. Like I said I wouldn't.

[headsplitter]

...Byleth?

[silentscout]

Mhmm.

[headsplitter]

[ He just continues to sit there... a dejected giant. ]

I don't get why she'd kill, either.

[silentscout]

I don't know if she would explain it to me if I asked. And I can't ask you, since you don't remember.

[headsplitter]

I don't... I mean, I just -- [ Wrings his hands a little, and sets them back down, defeated. ]

I don't have a reason to kill Molly. He and I were -- we were really similar.

[silentscout]

I believe you.

[He does, really.]

But that means it's even more important to find out why it happened.

[headsplitter]

...I get it, but...

Lalli, I don't think it's like what was going on with Rupert and Byleth.

[silentscout]

What do you think it is?

[headsplitter]

I think...

When Beau punched me, she... I felt something weird. Something different, and horrible well up inside of me.

I'd felt it, before... before coming here.

[silentscout]

...another 'you'? Someone else inside your head?

[headsplitter]

...Maybe.

[ He just tilts his head a bit downwards, looking really impressed. ]

...What if... what if whoever did that, that's who I really am?

[ And then, for a brief moment -- just a moment, Lalli might be seeing someone different. But it's just for a moment, and as soon as he blinks, double-takes, glances back, or anything -- he's just himself again. ]

[silentscout]

[Oh. That's no good at all. Hmm.]

...even if there is something else there, it's not you. It's something else.

You are Caiman. The guy who likes gyoza and baseball and doesn't want to kill anyone here because they're all friends. And even if someone else inside of you does things sometimes, that doesn't change who you are.

It's entirely possible to have one body with two souls in it. It happened to me, for a while. I got forced out of my own body and into someone else's for a few days. Any time I took control, it wasn't Emil doing something. It was me doing something using Emil's body.

It's the same for you, I think.

[headsplitter]

[ Just realized my last tag says 'impressed' instead of 'depressed' I'm in tears.

But he does glance back up at Lalli, then down. Just fiddling with his fingers a little bit. ]

It's a shit answer to give to people who are angry or sad at a place like trial and it's clearly not going to work as a clearing thing.

[ ... ]

But...

...Thanks, Lalli.

[silentscout]

If you had said it before, I could have defended you. I know enough about it to make a compelling argument and find a way to get the other 'thing' out of your body.

[What HE thinks is a compelling argument, at least.]

...but I don't blame you. For not wanting to tell.

[headsplitter]

It's not about wanting to tell more than that...

I never even knew it was a thing that could happen. To begin with.

[ He drops his gaze, once again. ]

[silentscout]

Oh.

[Lalli drops his gaze too.]

...it's still alright. It's not your fault.

[headsplitter]

...I don't know what I did that you'd believe this hard in me, but.

Thanks, Lalli.

[silentscout]

Mmm.

[Lalli doesn't know either. Trusting Caiman just comes naturally to him, like it's how things should be.

...he's going to scoot a little closer now, before asking a question:]

I'm not good at this kind of thing, but would a hug help right now?

[headsplitter]

[ Noooo Lalli... ]

...Never been asked that question. [ And he's never even thought about it. 'Cause, you know, he's always so happy and seemingly invulnerable to the miseries of the world. But he's not also about to reject Lalli on the spot here. ]

Sure.