silentscout | PCs with Caiman

[yeah he is absolutely going looking for Caiman. Where is he? I'm assuming the dorm somewhere and that's where Lalli will check first but he'll look all around for him if need be.]

[ He can be anywhere so the dorm works!! I'm crying at the OI!!!. Just kinda... standing in the dorm room, probably. Staring into it... trying to figure out what to do, now. ]

[Caiman...]

Hey.

[Tug tug on his sleeve. Snap out of it buddy.]

Huh? [ Oh, he glances down. ] Hey Lalli. What's up?

Are you okay? You were staring.

Yeah, I'm fine!

We got a guy, didn't we?

Even if it wasn't Bradley's...

How do you know it wasn't Bradley's?

I guess we don't, but we don't know it is Bradley, either.

Whichever way it is, it's a lot of trouble.

Mmm.

[He's still holding into Caiman's sleeve, even though he's glancing away.]

...give me an answer here, and I will believe it's the truth:

Was Lucretia right? Were you involved in a murder? Or was she just throwing stuff out there at the last minute just because?

Nah. [ He looks down at him and just lets him keep his sleeve. His expression is, all things considered, pretty simple... probably (lizard head). ]

I've killed a lot of people before, but I haven't killed anyone here.

...okay. I believe you.

[He said he would, after all.]

Don't kill anyone here, alright?

Good, 'cause I'm telling the truth.

...

What's with that warning? I gave up on the idea of killing everyone to get answers or to just get outta here weeks ago.

I don't want to see you die. But more importantly, I don't want to see you get voted out and put through all of that.

So don't do it, okay? Keep giving up on the idea of killing.

Geez Lalli! I keep telling you I don't have plans for it! If I don't gotta murder to get what I want in the end then why bother?

...

You guys are nice. It'd be like trying to kill friends.

Mmm.

[Honestly? He agrees there. Killing here...he couldn't do it.

...he's still not letting go btw.]

[ :sadworm:... ]

...Oi. [ He shakes his sleeve a bit. ] Wanna get some fresh air instead or something?

...okay.

[He's still in some sort of depressive mood here, but fresh air might help.

They just. Have to avoid the geese at the same time.]

[ It's so weird for Caiman to be the emotional support. And he's not a soft guy, as you could expect of him, so -- c'mon. The best that happens is that Lalli is just dragged along for the ride by virtue of him holding onto his sleeve. ]

Been on the roof yet?

I think I spent most of the first week on the roof.

...but we can go up there.

[He does like being tall.]

Alright, let's go then! [ Cause he just wants to chill too.

Lalli gonna climb or will he turtle on him? ]

[Lalli is a skilled climber and is already scrambling up the side of the building before Caiman finishes his sentence.]

[ CAIMAN BRUH MOMENT. Alright!! He's scrambling after then! Despite his size and what you'd want to believe, he is weirdly and ridiculously adept at this. So he's scaling fast after him and then crawling onto the roof.

Rolls over on his back and sighs. Then sits up and looks out. ]

Least here's always nice.

[That is impressive, and Lalli will give Caiman a thumbs-up once they're both on the roof. Good job, dude.

Then Lalli sits on the roof next to Caiman.]

Mmm. It's quiet up here.

Is that why you like it? Eh, guess it's good to have a reason. I dunno why I do, I just know. Maybe I climbed roofs a lot before. Like, before the whole lizard head thing.

Mhmm. Normally I work alone, so having time by myself that is quiet is nice.

[He considers that second part for a moment.]

Why did you get a lizard head in the first place? Curse?

Isn't all time quiet and by yourself if you work alone, though?! [ Looking over at him. ]

Oh... yeah, probably. I think so. Guys without magic like me who live in Hole, tend to get used as magic practice by Magic Users a lot. It's probably one of those.

I mean quiet time here. People snore.

[Lalli, laying awake under the bunk beds because of loud sleepers.]

So you have to get someone to un-magic your head?

[ Is Caiman guilty of snoring... I have no idea actually, you'd think he's a snorer but I think he actually isn't. Incredible! ]

Man, I wish it was that easy. I met a Sorcerer whose specialty was supposedly in changing heads and stuff, but it didn't do shit for me. Other than make me shed faster...

...oh. That makes sense.

[The shedding thing. He hadn't even considered it before.]

Maybe you need the help of a god to change back?

[ I thought about it and actually Caiman is probably a little noisy in sleep because of nightmares... nvm he's annoying in a different way. ]

Does it?! [ Caiman was so shocked to be shedding. For a moment, though, he looks intrigued by the concept of what Lalli says. ]

A god...

[ But dismisses it quickly. ]

Nah, those don't exist. Only Devils and they don't really do what you want.

[Caiman your sleeping habits.

And now Lalli looks offended.]

Gods do exist. They give people magic.

Give magic???

[ Huh! Caiman looks way more surprised about that over the whole god thing. ]

Damn, you, Caleb, Molly all live in better worlds! In mine, you're either born with it or you aren't. If you're born a human, that's it for ya.

You're still born with it in my world. But it comes from the gods.

[ If only Caiman knew the bit of lore to answer this since in Dorohedoroverse, magic comes from devils. Or rather one singular Devil. Jazzhands! ]

Does everyone have it?

[Monodevilist Dorohedoro...]

Not everyone, no. Just some people.

So then it's not all that different, is it...

Unless anyone can still learn?

Anyone can pray to the gods for their blessing. It might not be magic all the time, but it could help with a single problem.

[Like having a lizard head.]

[ Stop his lizard head. Caiman just glances at him and then away though, with a huff. ]

Then that's better off than my world. If you're not born with magic, then you're stuck playing the whims of whatever peop... le, that -- do.

[ He winces a little, as a sharp headache runs through him. ]

[Oh that's concerning. Lalli reaches out to put a hand on Caiman's shoulder.]

You okay?

-- Yeah! I'm -- fine. [ Said with a struggle but he shakes his head. The brief piercing pain subsides after a moment. ]

Headache... I get those a lot.

[CONCERNING...]

Do you need Otome?

Nah... I already talked to her, actually.

Besides, doctor or not, there's nothing you can do for nightmares and headaches.

Oh. It's that.

[He relaxes a little, because oh hey this is something he knows plenty about!]

...I don't know if it will work for you, because your head is different, but we can try something.

Huh? Really?

What've you got?

Do this.

[He holds up both of his hands, with only the index and middle fingers extended on both. Then he presses both to the spot between his temples and eyebrows, and he massages them in slow circles. He does it for a few seconds so Caiman can see, before pulling his hands away from his face.]

It helps ease the pain.

[ Ummm. Uhhhh. It's like looking at some kind of big origami project, here. He squints at the pose, and... okay, mimics it, and does basically the approximation of it on his big ol' lizard head.

Hmm... ]

Am I doin' this right? Kinda weird...

It looks right.

[He has no idea if it is correct on a lizard face.]

When you're stressed it pulls the skin and muscles in your face tight, which can cause headaches. So this helps with that.

Huh!

I'll remember that!

[ Dropping his hands. ]

Thanks Lalli.

Mmm.

[Sharing the headache-cure-knowledge!]

Making tea out of catnip helps too.

If there's catnip here, can you make me some?

I'll have to find some, but yes. I can.

Sweet! I'll look too!

[Yeah he is absolutely visiting Caiman. No way he's not, danger or no.

but he does stop at the door, peeking in to see how Caiman is doing before announcing his presence.]

[ He's just sitting there, still almost zombie-like as ever. His front is still covered in blood from his weird... moment, and his face still bruised up and large patches of bloodiness from his self-mutilation.

At least he isn't doing that anymore. Just... sitting there. ]

[He is just sitting there. So he'll go over and sit in front of Caiman. He's still watching him, waiting to see if he does anything.]

[ He doesn't seem to respond. Does he even acknowledge that Lalli is there? Is he even awake? It's hard to tell. Lalli's in his vision, at least -- but he doesn't respond, still. ]

...

[...]

Caiman?

[ He stirs... just a tiny bit. His head turning but only miniscule, like there's barely enough energy to even do that. ]

...L... [ Lalli. ]

[I fukken forgot Caiman is a lizard and probably sleeps with his eyes open.]

Mmm, I'm here. I didn't want you to be alone.

[ STOP HE SLEEPS WITH HIS EYES CLOSED LIKE A HUMAN. ]

...Lalli, I...

[ He raises his hands... slowly, almost timidly. They're both trembling, and he just drops them. ]

Why?

Because friends don't let friends be alone, especially during something like this.

Lalli...

[ The slightest slump of his shoulders, a release of tension but only due to resignation. ]

You're still going to call me that? After today?

Yes.

...I didn't vote for you. Like I said I wouldn't.

...Byleth?

Mhmm.

[ He just continues to sit there... a dejected giant. ]

I don't get why she'd kill, either.

I don't know if she would explain it to me if I asked. And I can't ask you, since you don't remember.

I don't... I mean, I just -- [ Wrings his hands a little, and sets them back down, defeated. ]

I don't have a reason to kill Molly. He and I were -- we were really similar.

I believe you.

[He does, really.]

But that means it's even more important to find out why it happened.

...I get it, but...

Lalli, I don't think it's like what was going on with Rupert and Byleth.

What do you think it is?

I think...

When Beau punched me, she... I felt something weird. Something different, and horrible well up inside of me.

I'd felt it, before... before coming here.

...another 'you'? Someone else inside your head?

...Maybe.

[ He just tilts his head a bit downwards, looking really impressed. ]

...What if... what if whoever did that, that's who I really am?

[ And then, for a brief moment -- just a moment, Lalli might be seeing someone different. But it's just for a moment, and as soon as he blinks, double-takes, glances back, or anything -- he's just himself again. ]

[Oh. That's no good at all. Hmm.]

...even if there is something else there, it's not you. It's something else.

You are Caiman. The guy who likes gyoza and baseball and doesn't want to kill anyone here because they're all friends. And even if someone else inside of you does things sometimes, that doesn't change who you are.

It's entirely possible to have one body with two souls in it. It happened to me, for a while. I got forced out of my own body and into someone else's for a few days. Any time I took control, it wasn't Emil doing something. It was me doing something using Emil's body.

It's the same for you, I think.

[ Just realized my last tag says 'impressed' instead of 'depressed' I'm in tears.

But he does glance back up at Lalli, then down. Just fiddling with his fingers a little bit. ]

It's a shit answer to give to people who are angry or sad at a place like trial and it's clearly not going to work as a clearing thing.

[ ... ]

But...

...Thanks, Lalli.

If you had said it before, I could have defended you. I know enough about it to make a compelling argument and find a way to get the other 'thing' out of your body.

[What HE thinks is a compelling argument, at least.]

...but I don't blame you. For not wanting to tell.

Edited 2021-07-04 12:42 (UTC)

It's not about wanting to tell more than that...

I never even knew it was a thing that could happen. To begin with.

[ He drops his gaze, once again. ]

Oh.

[Lalli drops his gaze too.]

...it's still alright. It's not your fault.

...I don't know what I did that you'd believe this hard in me, but.

Thanks, Lalli.

Mmm.

[Lalli doesn't know either. Trusting Caiman just comes naturally to him, like it's how things should be.

...he's going to scoot a little closer now, before asking a question:]

I'm not good at this kind of thing, but would a hug help right now?

[ Noooo Lalli... ]

...Never been asked that question. [ And he's never even thought about it. 'Cause, you know, he's always so happy and seemingly invulnerable to the miseries of the world. But he's not also about to reject Lalli on the spot here. ]

Sure.

[Well. He said sure, so Lalli is going to scoot closer to give Caiman a hug.

It's not a very strong one and it doesn't last long, he's really bad at the hugging thing. But he doesn't want Caiman to feel alone.]

[ ...

He just accepts it. God I wish I was at the canonpoint where I could share this mem just for this but know this happens in canon too and it's very sweet. ]

...Thanks.

Mmm. Everything will be fine.

[Caiman is going to be executed in the morning and all they have is a slim hope that maybe there's a way to bring everyone back. Everything is definitely not fine.

But it's okay to say that now, right? He doesn't want Caiman to be scared.]

[ Honestly, with how executions go, it's likely he'll probably die tomorrow. Caiman's never really thought about death as much as he's faced it all the time -- hell, he went in without fear nor hesitation towards a Sorcerer with a hammer who literally cracked a hole in his skull with the end of it, not even letting go when the hammer claw buried itself in his neck.

He's not afraid of death. He's barely even considered it. And he doesn't want to die, either -- so there's little choice for him to face execution the way he's always done.

As himself, no thoughts, only to do what must be done.

But he does pat Lalli on the arm. ]

It'll be fine, yeah. Though I guess, maybe don't come to execution tomorrow just in case.

[ Sike everyone showed up. ]

No, I'm still going to go. You're not Finnish, so I can't guide your soul. But I still want to make sure you're safe, even...

[Even after you die.

He doesn't have his powers so it's not like he can see anything, but old habits die hard.]

S'not like I can stop you, then. You can make your own choices.

[ Because after all, Caiman's not all about that shit like, 'this is for your own good' or whatever. Lalli can make his own decisions. ]

[Just like Lalli made friends with Caiman mirite?]

Mmm.

Wait here, I'll be right back.

[He's not going far, because his goal is just outside the classroom door. A few moments later, he brings Kissa in and takes her over to Caiman.]

Cats have special healing properties, especially for the heart.

[ Oh... kitty. Caiman perks up just a tiny tad about this... nooo, cute. He just looks at her quietly and almost a little nervously, because he heard animals just kind of know things sometimes, but presuming Kissa won't be hissing at him -- he just quietly pets her. Well, sort of. He just holds his hand there, a half-motion, and lets Kissa do her thing.

And also this is kind of an awkward time but idk when would be opportune while I have easy access to the pages, so! This is when Lalli gets the hell toilet memshare.

No I'm kidding he gets to have a proper one though I can still tell you wtf is hell toilet later. He gets these:

1, 2, 3, 4, 5.

Funny, that, since this is the second week of winter -- surely then, in some screwed up time way, New Years (at least in his calendar) must be here. A memory of a happier time, a happier way for the year to change, and still more, the promise of lasting friendship. ]

[ Sup Lalli. Post-endgame he's just... uh, he's just kinda mucking about, actually. Probably just sitting in the shade, nodding a little bit as if he's nodding off for a nap but not totally quite. Well, at least it's cooler down here than sitting outright in the sun. It's summer! ]

[SUP AIKAWA

Here have a Kissa in your lap.]

She'll nap with you if you're tired.

[ Oh -- he looks up as soon as Lalli shows up. Turns out he wasn't actually going to sleep, but he blinks. ]

Oh, hey -- uh, both of you. [ Cat and bigger cat, really. ]

Long day we had today. Week, even.

Mhmm. But now that we're done we can rest.

[He sits down next to Aikawa as Kissa makes herself comfortable.]

You just gonna head on home on that train once it's up and running?

[ Cats.................. really are serotonin.................. pet pet. ]

PCs with Caiman

Week 2, post-trial

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Week 3, post-trial

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